You are currently browsing the category archive for the 'Uncategorized' category.
You see now, I want to be there for you. I want to encourage you. The thing is, I encourage others through verses. Not the cliché “hang in there buddy”, “you’re trying your best, it’s ok” or “I’m here for you if you need anything”. Yes, those things can be true and relevant at times. But I do for others the things that I like done to me. Just like what Little Grey did for Sloan. Got into bed and stroked his head because, well, that’s what she liked done for her when she was hurt.
So, if I could, and if I didn’t feel like I’d be crossing the line, I’d message you tonnes of verses. But a part of me is pulling back because that’s not what you want. And right now, what I want is inconsequential. So I have to throw my hands up in the air and just stand at the sidelines to cheer you on. This time, you’ve got to do it with God. You and him. One on one. There are many, many people who want to carry that load for you, clean that slate you’ve made a mess of for you. But we can’t. Trust me, there are more people rooting for you to succeed than you realise. If you see this, maybe you’d kick yourself into gear and get a move on.
So as you travel this road and try to “re-build” your life, just know you’ve got a pretty massive group of people feverently praying and interceding for you. And if you ever need anything, they’d be the first to swim to you with the life buoy and not just throw you the ring and ask you to swim back on your own. (:
As for me, I’ll be living each day as it comes ensuring that all I do glorifies God as best it can. And if something happens the next day, or the next, or whenever, I’ll take it as it comes. For he knows the plans he has for me. He’ll never leave nor forsake me. And my hope is built on nothing less than his promises to me.
He promises the same to you.(:
amyruth.xxoo
It’s so easy to say I’ve got faith. It’s so easy to say I trust God. It’s so easy to say I’ll wait. It’s so easy to say so many things. I have faith, I do trust and I will wait on God and for you. But when the humdrum of life gets to me, just getting from day to day is like wrestling with all my ribs fractured. I just want to give up, throw in the trowel, scream in pain and run away. But anyone who knows me well enough knows that quitting is never an option. You’d have to force me to give up something; to let go; to let God.
Many consider that a strength. My determination, my purpose-driven agenda, my stubborness. But when it comes to matters that I need to wholly hand over to God, it’s my greatest weakness. I don’t give up. I keep holding on and it hurts God, others and me.
I don’t know where that line is. The line that we cross from mere words to actions that are a strong translation of those seemingly weighty words. I don’t know. But I do know I need to find it soon. Really soon.
It’s so easy to be smiley me. To be known as the girl who has it all together and everything going for her. But I’m not. It’s fake. And I manage to make myself believe it at times too. Why?! Pride is probably the answer. But this pride won’t let me change my ways either. It’s like the chicken and egg thing. Just keeps going round in circles.
So maybe, I think, the coward isn’t you.
It’s me. I’m the coward and I don’t know what to do.
amyruth.xxoo
You can’t help respecting anybody who can spell TUESDAY, even if he doesn’t spell it right; but spelling isn’t everything. There are days when spelling Tuesday simply doesn’t count.
amyruth.xxoo
I don’t want to go to church on my own. I know it’s for God. But friends. I want to be with my friends. I want to be with you. I don’t like being alone. I don’t like having to meet new people, make new “friends” and make small talk. It’s plastic. I’ve done enough plastic. I do it so much of the time even I’m getting sick of it.
I know. I’m an adult now and I should do this stuff. I should go out and do things on my own. God, just remind me please? That even if I sit alone on a pew in church and listen to the preacher, you’re with me. You’re right with me all the time. Cos I don’t want to be alone. I don’t.
It’s just too scary.
amyruth.xxoo
awesome!
amyruth.xxoo
I’m scraping the bottom. Looking for more. Searching for someone to fill my bowl. There’s got to be more. I know there is. But maybe, empty a while more, is what it is.
I told you to be good. And I know I shouldn’t worry. But I do. Oh boy, I do. I worry as if that’s all I am. I worry as if my worry will change circumstances. It won’t. You’re too far away to hear me anyway. But I can’t resign to a worry-less life. I try. But God is still teaching me. I’m a slow learner you know.
Guess I’ll just have to keep reciting Philippians 4:6-7, 1 Peter 5:6-7, Luke 12:22-26, Psalm 42:5, Proverbs 3:5-8, Philippians 4:19, Hebrews 13:6 and Psalm 131:1.
amyruth.xxoo
I am no genius. I am no wiseman. I am a girl who’s little faith will keep her going. He promised it would.
To you I can only say this because He said it to all of us:
Matthew 7:18-20
18A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. 19Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. 20Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.
amyruth.xxoo
What on earth are those things?
Mummy: Sweetie, you need someone who is going to look after you. You can’t always be taking care of him and worrying your head off when he’s out and off doing things you’re not comfortable with. You shouldn’t need to do all that.
Daughter looks down and smiles.
Mummy: You need taking care of. TLC.
I’m not sure I’ve found him yet. I mean, I’m sure he’s there. Cos that’s the way God created us right? I don’t want to have to pace up and down the living room, keep straightening out the bed sheets waiting for him to return. If a man has a wife, his place (besides work) should be the home. As is the same with the wife. This generation/society may be thinking differently. How then? I’m not going to change that rule.
How will he take care of me? *frowns I’m not sure. Brace yourself. Let me do this cheesy thing and get it over and done with.
- Do the washing up without asking.
- Leave little notes on the fridge for when I return from work. (ps. I’ll have odd working hours)
- Read a bible story or psalm to me randomly in the day.
- Plan ahead of time so that things actually work out.
- Come home for dinner when he knows I’ll be off work.
- Carry me to bed when I fall asleep somewhere else.
- Towel dry my hair when I can’t be bothered to do it myself.
- Dance with me wherever when the radio plays our song.
- Do silly things like 20 star jumps just to cheer me up.
- Prepare meals for me. (you know, like lunch boxes. heh)
- Listen intently to me when I go on and on about something that’s bothering me and then just tell me he loves me at the end of it all.
- Carry a packet of tissue with him cos he knows I won’t though I’ll always need them more.
- Be persistent even if it means literally picking me up so I get to where he wants me to be.
- Challenge me to new things.
- Willingly do silly little things like the chicken dance when I’m extra hyper.
- Let me play with his ears.
- Provide awesome piggy backs and cuddles.
- Not always treat me like a fragile flower.
- Wipe away my tears with his thumb and “kiss it all better”!
- Most of all? Walk so closely with God that I know I’m loved by a Christ-like man with a Christ-like love who will guide me towards a closer relationship with our Lord.
I’m sure there is so much more I could say. Not expecting it to land at the door in a basket and out pops a man all packaged and ready. Just thought that since I was thinking about it I might as well jot it down.
amyruth.xxoo
Jeremiah 29:11
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Recent Comments