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Have been reading “Boy meets Girl” by Joshua Harris. Just a large section I want to quote here. Feel everyone should read this. From pp. 176-179.

” Let’s gaze on it (the Cross) together. As we draw close, don’t assume that you already know or understand what happened there. Come to the Cross as if for the first time. In the book When God Weeps, Steven Estes and Joni Eareckson Tada give the following account of Christ’s death. As you read, refuse to let the scene be familiar. Let its reality shock you and break your heart.

The face that Moses had begged to see – was forbidden to see – was slapped bloody (Exodus 33:19-20). The thorns that God had sent to curse the earth’s rebellion now twisted around his own brow…

“On your back with you!” One raises a mallet to sink in the spike. But the soldier’s heart must continue pumping as he readies the prisoner’s wrist. Someone must sustain the soldier’s life minute by minute, for no man has the power on his own. Who supplies breath to his lungs? Who gives energy to his cells? Who holds his molecules together? Only by the Son do “all things hold together” (Colossians 1:17). The victim wills that the soldier live on – he grants the warriors continued existence. The man swings.

As the man swings, the Son recalls how he and the Father first designed the medial nerve of the human forearm – the sensations it would be capable of. The design proves flawless – the nerves perform exquisitely. “Up you go!” They lift the cross. God is on display in his underwear and can scarcely breathe.

But these pains are a mere warm-up to his other and growing dread. He begins to feel a foreign sensation. Somewhere during this day an unearthly foul odor began to waft, not around his nose, but his heart. He feels dirty. Human wickedness starts to crawl upon his spotless being – the living excrement from our souls. The apple of his Father’s eye turns brown with rot.

His Father! He must face his Father like this!

From Heaven the Father now rouses himself like a lion disturbed, shakes his mane, and roars against the shriveling remnant of a man hanging on a cross. Never has the Son seem the Father look at him so, never felt even the least of his hot breath. But the roar shakes the unseen world and darkens the visible sky. The Son does not recognise these eyes.

“Son of Man! Why have you behaved so? You have cheated, lusted, stolen, gossiped – murdered, envied, hated, lied. You have cursed, robbed, overspent, overeaten – fornicated, disobeyed, embezzled, and blasphemed. Oh, the duties you have shirked, the children you have abandoned! Who has ever so ignored the poor, so played the coward, so belittled my name? Have you ever held your razor tongue? What a self-righteous, pitiful drunk – you, who molest young boys, peddle killer drugs, travel in cliques, and mock your parents. Who gave you the boldness to rig elections, foment revolutions, torture animals, and worship demons? Does the list never end! Splitting families, raping virgins, acting smugly, playing the pimp – buying pornography, accepting bribes. You have burned down buildings, perfected terrorist tactics, founded false religions, traded in slaves – relishing each morsel and bragging about it all. I hate, loathe this things in you! Disgust for everything about you consumes me! Can you not feel my wrath?”

Of course the Son is innocent. He is blamelessness itself. The Father knows this. But the divine pair have an agreement, and the unthinkable must now take place. Jesus will be treated as if personally responsible for every sin ever committed.

The Father watches as his heart’s treasure, the mirror image of himself, sinks drowning into raw, liquid sin. Jehovah’s stored rage against humankind for every century explodes in a single direction.

” Father! Father! Why have you forsaken me?!”

But heaven stops its ears. The Son stares up at the One who cannot, who will not, reach down or reply.

The Trinity had planned it. The Son endured it. The Spirit enabled him. The father rejected the Son whom he loved. Jesus, the God-man from Nazareth, perished. The Father accepted his sacrifice for sin and was satisfied. The Rescue was accomplished.

Don’t move to quickly from this scene. Keep gazing.

The Rescue accomplished here was for you. John Scott writes, “Before we can begin to see the cross as something done for us (leading us to faith and worship), we have to see it as something done by us (leading us to repentance) … As we face the cross, then, we can say to ourselves both ‘I did it; my sins sent Him there,’ and ‘He did it; His love took Him there.'”

Did you see your own offense on the list of sins that necessitated the Cross? If not, name them yourself. Name your darkest sin. Now reflect on the fact that Christ bore the punishment for that sin. He took the punishment you deserved. Do you feel His passionate and specific love for you? He died for you. He was condemned and cursed so that you could go free – He was forsaken by God so that you would never be forsaken (Hebrews 13:5).”

In Christ,

amyruth. xxxooo

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Listen here.

You are my hiding place
You always fill my heart
With songs of deliverance
Whenever I am afraid
I will trust in You

I will trust in You
Let the weak say
I am strong
In the strength of the Lord

You are my hiding place
You always fill my heart
With songs of deliverance
Whenever I am afraid
I will trust in You

I will trust in You
Let the weak say I am strong
In the strength of the Lord
I will trust in You

Amen.

❤ amyruth.

i found this ultimate website. go see and try to become a specialist. its about doing open heart surgery. simulation of course.

just for records sake, i killed about 12 patients before i became a specialist. hehheh.

another thing… got this real cute email…

New school semester:
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At the first week:
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At the second week:
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Before the mid-term test:
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During the mid-term test:
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After the mid-term test:
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Before the final exam:
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Once know the final exam schedule:
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7 days before final exam:
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6 days before final exam:
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5 days before final exam:
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4 days before final exam:
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3 days before final exam:
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2 days before final exam:
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1 day before final exam:
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A night before final exam:
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1 hour before final exam:
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During the final exam:
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Once walk out from the exam hall:
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After the final exam, during the holiday:
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sooooooo.cute and funny.

A MORE SERIOUS NOTE…

Around the corner I have a friend,
In this great city that has no end,
Yet the days go by and weeks rush on,
And before I know it, a year is gone.
And I never see my old friends face,
For life is a swift and terrible race,
He knows> I like him just as well,
As in the days when I rang his bell.
And he rang mine but we were younger then,
And now we are busy, tired men.Tired of playing a foolish game,
Tired of trying to make a name.
“Tomorrow” I say! “I will call on Jim
But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,
And distance between us grows and grows.
Around the corner, yet miles away,
“Here’s a telegram sir,” “Jim died today.”
And that’s what we get and deserve in the end.
Around the corner, a vanished friend.

This was so sad. But yet so true i guess.

A lot of things have been happening. Don’t know where to start. Whatever it is, by prayer and supplication, we are asked to bring our requests and petitions to our heavenly Father who loves us like none other! Only he can comfort and help. I don’t see how you can live without him. I just can’t.

Love,

amyruth.

AMEN!!

I’ve cut my hair! feels way better now. After my time at school i headed over to BT plaza and searched for a hairdresser’s. Aimed to go all the way to HV but decided against that. Much closer to home. Top floor and nice atmosphere. Had a guy cut and wash my hair this time. Not much difference. Just feel more tense. Shorter than before (DUH!!) with a nice fringe. Can’t tie it up that much i think. Not that I have tried yet.

Got a slight headache so shall drink some water and get some sleep before getting down to lots of work. Won’t have that much time to do it tomorrow.

 Nothing much else to say. So there goes.

 SMILE!!

amyruth.

It’s only now when words are said that break my heart in two, I wonder how you can endure
all I’ve said, all I say to you.
How strong, how brave, how true of you to bear the hurt I gave. I know it tears your heart in two:
all I’ve said, all I say to you.
After all the words are said, after all the dreams we made; every one a precious one, every one a summer sun…

A moment lost, forever gone, can never be again, so know how much it means to me; all you said,
all you gave, all your love to me.
<3amyruth.

Summer. When the day is over there’s a heart a little colder; someone said goodbye, but you don’t know why.
Somewhere there is someone keeping all the tears they have been weeping, someone said goodbye, but you don’t know why.
Is there a reason why a broken heart begins to cry? Is there a reason you were lost although you don’t know why?
Give me a reason why you never want to say goodbye. If there’s a reason, I don’t know why.
Always looking for a meaning, all the time you keep believing, but I don’t know why
you won’t say goodbye.
Even when the sun is shining you don’t see the silver lining, but I don’t know why
you won’t say goodbye.
Is there a reason why a broken dream can never fly? Is there a reason
you believe and then you close your eyes?
Give me a reason why you hide away so much inside. If there’s a reason, I don’t know why.
Is there a reason why a broken heart begins to cry? Is there a reason you were lost although you don’t know why?
Give me a reason why you never want to say goodbye. If there’s a reason I don’t know why.
I don’t know why.
I don’t know why.
I don’t know why.

amyruth.

 1 I am the man who has seen affliction by the rod of his wrath. 2 He has driven me away and made me walk in darkness rather than light; 3 indeed, he has turned his hand against me again and again, all day long. 4 He has made my skin and my flesh grow old and has broken my bones. 5 He has besieged me and surrounded me with bitterness and hardship. 6 He has made me dwell in darkness like those long dead. 7 He has walled me in so I cannot escape; he has weighed me down with chains. 8 Even when I call out or cry for help, he shuts out my prayer. 9 He has barred my way with blocks of stone; he has made my paths crooked. 10 Like a bear lying in wait, like a lion in hiding, 11 he dragged me from the path and mangled me and left me without help. 12 He drew his bow and made me the target for his arrows. 13 He pierced my heart with arrows from his quiver. 14 I became the laughingstock of all my people; they mock me in song all day long. 15 He has filled me with bitter herbs and sated me with gall. 16 He has broken my teeth with gravel; he has trampled me in the dust. 17 I have been deprived of peace; I have forgotten what prosperity is. 18 So I say, “My splendor is gone and all that I had hoped from the LORD.” 19 I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. 20 I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me.

21 Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: 22 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. 23 They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. 24 I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” 25 The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; 26 it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD. 27 It is good for a man to bear the yoke while he is young. 28 Let him sit alone in silence, for the LORD has laid it on him. 29 Let him bury his face in the dust— there may yet be hope. 30 Let him offer his cheek to one who would strike him, and let him be filled with disgrace.

31 For men are not cast off by the Lord forever. 32 Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. 33 For he does not willingly bring affliction or grief to the children of men. 34 To crush underfoot all prisoners in the land, 35 to deny a man his rights before the Most High, 36 to deprive a man of justice— would not the Lord see such things? 37 Who can speak and have it happen if the Lord has not decreed it?  38 Is it not from the mouth of the Most High that both calamities and good things come? 39 Why should any living man complain when punished for his sins?

40 Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the LORD. 41 Let us lift up our hearts and our hands to God in heaven, and say: 42 “We have sinned and rebelled and you have not forgiven. 43 “You have covered yourself with anger and pursued us; you have slain without pity. 44 You have covered yourself with a cloud so that no prayer can get through. 45 You have made us scum and refuse among the nations. 46 “All our enemies have opened their mouths wide against us. 47 We have suffered terror and pitfalls, ruin and destruction.”

48 Streams of tears flow from my eyes because my people are destroyed. 49 My eyes will flow unceasingly, without relief, 50 until the LORD looks down from heaven and sees. 51 What I see brings grief to my soul because of all the women of my city. 52 Those who were my enemies without cause hunted me like a bird. 53 They tried to end my life in a pit and threw stones at me; 54 the waters closed over my head, and I thought I was about to be cut off. 55 I called on your name, O LORD, from the depths of the pit. 56 You heard my plea: “Do not close your ears to my cry for relief.” 57 You came near when I called you, and you said, “Do not fear.” 58 O Lord, you took up my case; you redeemed my life. 59 You have seen, O LORD, the wrong done to me. Uphold my cause! 60 You have seen the depth of their vengeance, all their plots against me. 61 O LORD, you have heard their insults, all their plots against me- 62 what my enemies whisper and mutter against me all day long. 63 Look at them! Sitting or standing, they mock me in their songs. 64 Pay them back what they deserve, O LORD, for what their hands have done. 65 Put a veil over their hearts, and may your curse be on them! 66 Pursue them in anger and destroy them from under the heavens of the LORD.

i’m just smiling from ear to ear. i can’t believe this is happening((((:

God bless, people! He really does!!

<3amyruth.

 1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
       O LORD Almighty! 2 My soul yearns, even faints,
       for the courts of the LORD;
       my heart and my flesh cry out
       for the living God.

 3 Even the sparrow has found a home,
       and the swallow a nest for herself,
       where she may have her young—
       a place near your altar,
       O LORD Almighty, my King and my God.

 4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house;
       they are ever praising you.
       Selah

 5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
       who have set their hearts on pilgrimage.

 6 As they pass through the Valley of Baca,
       they make it a place of springs;
       the autumn rains also cover it with pools. [b]

 7 They go from strength to strength,
       till each appears before God in Zion.

 8 Hear my prayer, O LORD God Almighty;
       listen to me, O God of Jacob.
       Selah

 9 Look upon our shield, [c] O God;
       look with favor on your anointed one.

 10 Better is one day in your courts
       than a thousand elsewhere;
       I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
       than dwell in the tents of the wicked.

 11 For the LORD God is a sun and shield;
       the LORD bestows favor and honor;
       no good thing does he withhold
       from those whose walk is blameless.

 12 O LORD Almighty,
       blessed is the man who trusts in you.

AMEN TO THAT!!!

amyruth.

another semester has just started. how’d you take that? no clue.

nice to be back amongst friends and be reminded that they really care.

how’d this day proceed? well, after a few rather large hiccups we started lessons proper with NSL at 11. a new lecturer in a sucky classroom wasn’t the best but we had fun all the same. packed lunch from SIM quitened our growling stomachs. [at least mine was noisy] and then we headed to PHARM lecture followed by AAP lecture. need to get back into the swing of things. funny how far you can be thrown off with just 7 weeks of break.

despite the bombarding changes in schedule and what not, certain things have not altered though i wish they had. shall not worry though. keep being reminded not to worry. so many questions shall remain unanswered i guess. better left unsaid, not understood and to a certain degree – misunderstood. just don’t come back okay? don’t expect that to happen.

arhmmm. nothing much else left to be said.

amyruth.